Tuesday, 12 March 2019

This Past Week...

Things that pissed me off in the past week:

1) Windows updates: Which, as far as I can tell, are geared towards giving Windows apps more access to my personal information, and serve no other purpose.

2) The Bell guy: Doorbell rings. I ignore it. Thirty seconds later, it rings again. Thinking a neighbor might need something, I answer. Not a neighbor, it's the Bell guy.

Seriously, dude, two rings are for emergencies only. (Not his first visit, I might add.)

Even after I clearly state it's a bad time, he launches into his "this is the best offer ever you really need to switch to Bell and you really need to do it now" speech. Mid-spiel, I repeat it's a bad time and close the door.

I was tempted to add, "For as long as we live in this house we will not be switching to Bell. Fuck off and don't come back." I kept those thoughts to myself. But if Kiddo, who was napping, had woken up to the sound of that second ring of the doorbell, I'm not sure I could have restrained myself.

3) Static: It was time to change Kiddo's bed sheets. I pulled them off the bed (apparently building up quite the static charge in the process). Sheets bundled under one arm, I turned to leave the room. The clock caught my eye--this was on Sunday, by the way--I realized hadn't adjusted the time yet.

I can do that one handed, it'll only take a second...

I reached out with my free hand. Snap! As I pulled back from the surprisingly-painful shock, the time on the clock jumped to 12:00. Some of the buttons, including the set button, are now dead. Which brings me to...

4) Daylight Savings: When will the insanity end?

Things I enjoyed in the past week:

1) Having a phone chat with a friend I haven't spoken to in ages--two friends, actually, if I go back a few weeks. It was great catching up with both of them. Note to self: I have some good friends. I really need to do a better job staying in touch with them.

2) Reading the Alistair Reynolds novella Diamond Dogs. For someone who likes to write science fiction, I haven't been consuming enough of it lately.

3) Finishing Shetland on Netflix. If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend it. Though, if you're like me, it might make you want to move to rural Scotland. Unfortunately, I now have to wait for the latest season to come out on TV in the old-school, one-episode-per-week fashion. I should find this prospect less distressing than I do, considering I have memories of watching a little black-and-white TV with a coat hanger for an antenna.

4) Watching Kiddo's swimming lesson. He just finished his first 8-week session without a parent in the pool. A few months ago Hubby and I had a conversation that went something like this:

Hubby: "I think he's ready to do swimming lessons on his own."

Me: "You're kidding."

Hubby: "He's definitely ready."

Me: "No way. He'll freak out."

Hubby: "He'll do fine. He is so ready. "

Me: "He's so not ready."

We went back and forth for a while. I gave in, and Hubby signed Kiddo up for the no-parent lessons.

Hubby was right. Kiddo did great. Moral of the story: I have a tendency to underestimate my son. (Of course, I kinda knew that already.)

Tuesday, 12 February 2019

Ever Wonder Who is Really in Charge?

Whether I'm gone for two hours, or two seconds, I always come back to this:

 The cat doesn't even need to be in the room when I get up. She just knows...

Tuesday, 5 February 2019

Things Kids Say

Kiddo recently had the following conversation with his dad:

Kiddo: "Mommy's mommy is Grammie."

Dad: "That's right."

Kiddo: "Your mommy is Oma."

Dad: "Yes."

Kiddo: "There are lots of mommies."

Dad: "Yes there are."

Kiddo: "And lots of daddies."

Dad: "And lots of little boys and girls."

Kiddo: "There are lots of reindeers!!"

Always fun to see where his brain will jump next. It's safe to say Kiddo is learning to appreciate the holiday concept, or rather the 'treats and presents' concept.

We were still discussing Halloween regularly right up to Christmas Eve, and odd mentions of pumpkins, skeletons, and costumes still surface now and then. Just yesterday we had a recounting of the costumes of all the neighborhood children Kiddo's age.

I predict random Christmas commentary will continue indefinitely, or at least until his birthday (in August).

Tuesday, 29 January 2019

More Reading = Less TV?

I love to read. I also love to watch TV. Unfortunately, in order to consume as many stories in both mediums as I would like, I'd have to give up sleep.

I like sleep. I need sleep. You don't want to spend the day with me if I have not slept.

Lately I've found TV has been winning over reading. Let's face it, after Kiddo goes to bed, it's easier to zone out in front of Netflix than read a book. Books require concentration.

I was out shopping recently, and thinking how I would like to push the reading vs watching balance back toward the reading end of the spectrum, at least a little bit. I popped into Indigo and grabbed George R.R. Martin's Nightflyers.

The good news is: I enjoyed it. It kept me awake for more than three pages at a time, even after 10pm. These days, that's saying something.

The bad news is: As you can see from the cover, this book has been turned into a TV series. Now I have more TV to watch.

Tuesday, 22 January 2019

Truffula Trees

Yesterday, I read Kiddo The Lorax. He immediately went downstairs to build a 'big chopper' and some truffula trees out of Duplo:

Based on the fate of the trees, I think it's safe to assume he missed the intended moral of the story 😄

Friday, 16 November 2018

Kiddo Questions: Piano

My piano is currently on the floor in the living room. It has a stand, but the stand has collapsed twice. Until I find a new one, the piano will stay on the ground. Not the most decorative arrangement, but on the plus side, Kiddo has easy access.

Mostly, he's interested in rolling his toy cars over the keys. He's also figured out how to get the demo songs to play. Every once in a while he actually tries to play it properly. Recently, he started counting the keys from left to right. I seized the teaching moment.

Me: "This is the A-key, B, C, D, E, F, G. Then it starts again with A, B, C"

Kiddo: "Where's the H go?"

Me: "There's no H on the piano."

Kiddo: "There is."

Me: "No, there isn't."

Kiddo, banging the keys consecutively, "H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P..."

Maybe a bit too soon for piano lessons.

Friday, 9 November 2018

Beer Slushy

Everyone has their own idea about what makes for the perfect beer. Personally, I like a beer as cold as physically possible without being frozen. I would love to visit the UK one day, but I really cannot get behind the whole warm beer idea.

(Ok, technically I've been to London, but it doesn't really count. I never left the airport and didn't have a beer.)

To accomplish the perfectly-cold beer, I start by putting the glass in the freezer. Sometimes, especially if I'm dealing with recently-purchased, yet-to-be-refrigerated beer, the can/bottle goes in the freezer too. This is a delicate process. When carried out perfectly, the beer is a fraction of a degree above freezing and a light layer of slush forms on top as it's poured into the frozen glass.

If left in too long, the beer will freeze. Depending on to what extent the beer has frozen, this leads to ice chunks that make the pouring process impossible, and/or beer that explodes on opening. Historically, these were the only adverse outcomes in my personal experience.

It turns out there is a point on the spectrum between "thin layer of slush" and "too frozen to pour". It's called the beer slushy:

That's not foam on top. It's ice.

A picture taken one minute earlier would have depicted a glass entirely filled with still-expanding ice, and foamy slush spilling over the top. I didn't take that picture because I was busy trying to slurp the slush-foam as it escaped. My husband was kind enough to help, and we managed to prevent a major mess on the counter. If I'm ever hired to make a beer commercial I will attempt to recreate the effect. It looked awesome.